Hey guys! If you want to keep up with me, come on over to Skype :)
Not only will I be posting regularly on here but occasionally I'll be on Skype! I've taught the parentals how to use it and I talk to my best friends on it so...add me :)
Crimsntidegrl is my screen name :)
Much love and many blessings.
Amber :)
Monday, September 26, 2011
Friday, September 23, 2011
Content.
I've learned in my life that God really doesn't like contentment.
When I was 12, my dad decided to pastor and to be honest, I was perfectly content with my life at that time. It took me a while to become content with my life for the next two years but by the time I had become content with it, it was time for another change. When contentment finally came with my college situation, it was time to move to Birmingham...driving back and forth from Gadsden wasn't going to cut it anymore. By the time the first boyfriend rolled around, 9 months in I was so content I couldn't stand myself but that fall, everything changed!
Fall 2009 was when EJM came to visit (after their 2007 visit [an entirely new team]), I moved from Birmingham back home to Gadsden, my boyfriend broke up with me and I realized I was called to The Well with my spiritual leaders Blake & Stacey Sitz. Over the next four and a half months, my life drastically changed and by January 2010, I was back at SEBC...
The summer of 2010 I went back to The Well and by then, boyfriend number two had come into the picture. Before I knew it, he had walked out on me and I was letting people take advantage of my bitterness and hurt, which led me to leave The Well again. In the midst of all this, my dream of traveling the world, ministering the Gospel never died out. Prophecies over my life from people such as Blake, his brother Lane, and other people I've known who walk in the gift of the prophetic had all confirmed that was the Lord's plan for me - I just had to be patient and wait on His timing.
In February 2011, I went back to The Well part-time and by May I was full-time. I went back just to sing and ended up dancing again...which put joy back into my life that I thought I had lost. I finally began making deep friendships and really becoming content and things started to change. People started disliking my involvement at The Well, people were trying to pull me away and I started making some not so Amber-like decisions. Because of that, I got into some trouble with my parents but, things were made right and my life went back to semi-normal! Within days, I had a text from Eddie James, a dear family friend, inviting me to join EJM. I always told God, no matter what, when that door was opened that I'd walk through it...so I did.
Within 24 hours I had packed up everything I would need for 3 months and left for Hamilton, Alabama. I only had enough time to say goodbye to my parents, Blake, Austin, Mandy, Krislyn and Cayson (all dear friends and fellow leaders at The Well) and the people at Family Christian (I still had to work that day - lol). It was a very emotional time for me and here, a week and a half later, I still miss home. Listening to people who have been here 6 months, even a year, I don't think that sentiment ever goes away. You always miss home.
God uprooted me and replanted me for a season, I don't know how long, but I'm going to learn all I can in this season to be able to go on to my next assignment when He's ready. I'm not sure as some others that my time at The Well is completely up...I feel there is going to be an in between stage between EJM and my next step and that The Well will be that resting place. That return home...whether for a month or a year...but for now, I am singing with Eddie James Ministries and ministering to people I only dreamed I would reach. This has been a dream in my heart/Spirit since I was 15/16 years old. To be able to live this out, is just a God thing. Only He could open the door and only He can shut it. So I ask that you pray for me as I am on this EJM journey. I left photography, I left dancing, I left a job I loved, I left my parents, I left a Spiritual family that I love and hold dearer than most of my family...for a short time I've even left singing (no singing until I learn all the music - lol). It's been painful and very uncomfortable but God doesn't like it when we are comfortable! Just remember, when you are comfortable, something is probably fixing to change!!!
"Say goodbye to my father, my mother, turn my back on every other lover but I press on! Yes I, press on! I AM IN LOVE WITH YOU - THERE IS NOT COST! I AM IN LOVE WITH YOU - THERE IS NO LOSS!" - Misty Edwards
When I was 12, my dad decided to pastor and to be honest, I was perfectly content with my life at that time. It took me a while to become content with my life for the next two years but by the time I had become content with it, it was time for another change. When contentment finally came with my college situation, it was time to move to Birmingham...driving back and forth from Gadsden wasn't going to cut it anymore. By the time the first boyfriend rolled around, 9 months in I was so content I couldn't stand myself but that fall, everything changed!
Fall 2009 was when EJM came to visit (after their 2007 visit [an entirely new team]), I moved from Birmingham back home to Gadsden, my boyfriend broke up with me and I realized I was called to The Well with my spiritual leaders Blake & Stacey Sitz. Over the next four and a half months, my life drastically changed and by January 2010, I was back at SEBC...
The summer of 2010 I went back to The Well and by then, boyfriend number two had come into the picture. Before I knew it, he had walked out on me and I was letting people take advantage of my bitterness and hurt, which led me to leave The Well again. In the midst of all this, my dream of traveling the world, ministering the Gospel never died out. Prophecies over my life from people such as Blake, his brother Lane, and other people I've known who walk in the gift of the prophetic had all confirmed that was the Lord's plan for me - I just had to be patient and wait on His timing.
In February 2011, I went back to The Well part-time and by May I was full-time. I went back just to sing and ended up dancing again...which put joy back into my life that I thought I had lost. I finally began making deep friendships and really becoming content and things started to change. People started disliking my involvement at The Well, people were trying to pull me away and I started making some not so Amber-like decisions. Because of that, I got into some trouble with my parents but, things were made right and my life went back to semi-normal! Within days, I had a text from Eddie James, a dear family friend, inviting me to join EJM. I always told God, no matter what, when that door was opened that I'd walk through it...so I did.
Within 24 hours I had packed up everything I would need for 3 months and left for Hamilton, Alabama. I only had enough time to say goodbye to my parents, Blake, Austin, Mandy, Krislyn and Cayson (all dear friends and fellow leaders at The Well) and the people at Family Christian (I still had to work that day - lol). It was a very emotional time for me and here, a week and a half later, I still miss home. Listening to people who have been here 6 months, even a year, I don't think that sentiment ever goes away. You always miss home.
God uprooted me and replanted me for a season, I don't know how long, but I'm going to learn all I can in this season to be able to go on to my next assignment when He's ready. I'm not sure as some others that my time at The Well is completely up...I feel there is going to be an in between stage between EJM and my next step and that The Well will be that resting place. That return home...whether for a month or a year...but for now, I am singing with Eddie James Ministries and ministering to people I only dreamed I would reach. This has been a dream in my heart/Spirit since I was 15/16 years old. To be able to live this out, is just a God thing. Only He could open the door and only He can shut it. So I ask that you pray for me as I am on this EJM journey. I left photography, I left dancing, I left a job I loved, I left my parents, I left a Spiritual family that I love and hold dearer than most of my family...for a short time I've even left singing (no singing until I learn all the music - lol). It's been painful and very uncomfortable but God doesn't like it when we are comfortable! Just remember, when you are comfortable, something is probably fixing to change!!!
"Say goodbye to my father, my mother, turn my back on every other lover but I press on! Yes I, press on! I AM IN LOVE WITH YOU - THERE IS NOT COST! I AM IN LOVE WITH YOU - THERE IS NO LOSS!" - Misty Edwards
Friday, September 16, 2011
My Story - in light of Exodus
This week for school, I had to write part of my testimony in light of 4 themes we see in Exodus and still compare things in my story to the Israelites. So, I thought I'd post it here on my blog! Enjoy :)
Redemption –
I remember vividly crying out to God back in 2009 for deliverance from depression. Like the Israelites, I allowed myself to become overtaken by the enemy and I became bound by a bondage I never thought would enter my life. My first boyfriend (we were together almost eleven months and I was promised to him) decided to breakup with me because I obeyed God in a certain situation in my life. At first, I kept my face set like flint on God’s face and wasn’t swayed by the circumstances but over time, the enemy crept in my mind and I was defeated (as the Israelites were when Moses hit the scene). It was a long three month battle until finally…
Liberation –
One Sunday night at my dad’s church in little Attalla, Alabama, I was set free! I had spent the weekend begging and pleading for God to move – I had to have freedom – and He heard my cries! Alter call was just for me and He used a dear friend to help lead me out. Just like Moses had to pray like there was no tomorrow for the Israelites – this wonderful woman of God prayed for me like there was no Monday! She did not really know what had been going on in my mind, but she began pleading the blood over my mind and it was not long before freedom came!
Sanctification/Identity –
Once I began walking in my freedom, I had to learn who I was in Christ all over again. I had to learn the simple things such as, “I am fearfully and wonderfully made…” all the way to the big things such as hearing His voice and ministering for His glory with no selfish ambitions/thoughts. I am sure the Israelites had to re-learn when their freedom came just as we have to today! They were so accustomed to slavery when their shackles were loosed, I am sure they had to learn to do things without fear. In Egypt, one wrong move or glance could get them beaten; even speaking while working could earn being whipped. It was in the “re-learning” process I realized that all I truly needed was God! Through my depression, I had turned to TV shows, food and people…when all I needed was to keep drawing near to God! After being taken into captivity, the Israelites eventually lost sight of God and started looking at things and situations around them. Once they were released from captivity, it took a very, very, very long time for them to find their identity in God and to trust Him again. Even after every miracle He performed for them – they would not trust Him. Trusting God after the miracle He performed for me – to pull me out of the captivity I was in – was easy! I still haven’t figured out how the Israelites could not REALLY get out of Egypt. I guess the old saying reigns true…
Revelation –
You can take the Israelite out of Egypt but you can’t take Egypt out of the Israelite. After freedom, the enemy tried to bind my mind more than once, but my relationship with God was so different. My focus was Him and His plan more than it ever had been! My life was not centered around TV shows or people – it was all about God. And now, two years later, my face has stayed fixed on His and He’s opened doors that I never dreamt possible!
Redemption –
I remember vividly crying out to God back in 2009 for deliverance from depression. Like the Israelites, I allowed myself to become overtaken by the enemy and I became bound by a bondage I never thought would enter my life. My first boyfriend (we were together almost eleven months and I was promised to him) decided to breakup with me because I obeyed God in a certain situation in my life. At first, I kept my face set like flint on God’s face and wasn’t swayed by the circumstances but over time, the enemy crept in my mind and I was defeated (as the Israelites were when Moses hit the scene). It was a long three month battle until finally…
Liberation –
One Sunday night at my dad’s church in little Attalla, Alabama, I was set free! I had spent the weekend begging and pleading for God to move – I had to have freedom – and He heard my cries! Alter call was just for me and He used a dear friend to help lead me out. Just like Moses had to pray like there was no tomorrow for the Israelites – this wonderful woman of God prayed for me like there was no Monday! She did not really know what had been going on in my mind, but she began pleading the blood over my mind and it was not long before freedom came!
Sanctification/Identity –
Once I began walking in my freedom, I had to learn who I was in Christ all over again. I had to learn the simple things such as, “I am fearfully and wonderfully made…” all the way to the big things such as hearing His voice and ministering for His glory with no selfish ambitions/thoughts. I am sure the Israelites had to re-learn when their freedom came just as we have to today! They were so accustomed to slavery when their shackles were loosed, I am sure they had to learn to do things without fear. In Egypt, one wrong move or glance could get them beaten; even speaking while working could earn being whipped. It was in the “re-learning” process I realized that all I truly needed was God! Through my depression, I had turned to TV shows, food and people…when all I needed was to keep drawing near to God! After being taken into captivity, the Israelites eventually lost sight of God and started looking at things and situations around them. Once they were released from captivity, it took a very, very, very long time for them to find their identity in God and to trust Him again. Even after every miracle He performed for them – they would not trust Him. Trusting God after the miracle He performed for me – to pull me out of the captivity I was in – was easy! I still haven’t figured out how the Israelites could not REALLY get out of Egypt. I guess the old saying reigns true…
Revelation –
You can take the Israelite out of Egypt but you can’t take Egypt out of the Israelite. After freedom, the enemy tried to bind my mind more than once, but my relationship with God was so different. My focus was Him and His plan more than it ever had been! My life was not centered around TV shows or people – it was all about God. And now, two years later, my face has stayed fixed on His and He’s opened doors that I never dreamt possible!
Tuesday, August 16, 2011
Contemplation.
It's a big word with a small meaning. In the south, it simply means to think back. After the death of my dear friend Daq last week, I've had plenty of time to think back; to think about my regrets and how I wish I could redo my February-April 2011 with every ounce of EVERYTHING within me! I wish I was returning to SEBC this week for my last semester (or two)...but I'm not. Why some things have happened in my life, I'll never know but...for some reason...God has been teaching me things lately that I apparently had yet to learn.
I've taken advantage of so many amazing opportunities in my life and let so many people down...and hurt people...and thinking about it today, it broke my heart. I allowed my circumstances to control my emotions which controlled my life and the last six months have just plain sucked because of it.
To all those I hurt, or let down; I am so sorry! I never meant to hurt you or to ever let you down! I know how it feels, and it's crummy! More than likely, I love you very much and definitely would never do anything to hurt anyone...but I know that sometimes things are done unintentionally and on my part...it was definitely unintentional!
Prayers are appreciated and I ask that you please pray for Daq's family and friends! Continue to pray for SEBC as well; to lose a professor one year and a student the next, it's a tough thing! My friends there mean the world to me and I just ask that you lift them up in your prayers!
Much love and many blessings,
Amber <3
I've taken advantage of so many amazing opportunities in my life and let so many people down...and hurt people...and thinking about it today, it broke my heart. I allowed my circumstances to control my emotions which controlled my life and the last six months have just plain sucked because of it.
To all those I hurt, or let down; I am so sorry! I never meant to hurt you or to ever let you down! I know how it feels, and it's crummy! More than likely, I love you very much and definitely would never do anything to hurt anyone...but I know that sometimes things are done unintentionally and on my part...it was definitely unintentional!
Prayers are appreciated and I ask that you please pray for Daq's family and friends! Continue to pray for SEBC as well; to lose a professor one year and a student the next, it's a tough thing! My friends there mean the world to me and I just ask that you lift them up in your prayers!
Much love and many blessings,
Amber <3
Thursday, August 11, 2011
Saying goodbye...
...to someone dear to your heart is one of the hardest things to do.
I found out yesterday that my dear friend Daq from Southeastern Bible College passed away. He was 26-years-old and suffered a heart-attack. I just talked to him on the phone about a photo shoot last week...my heart is still breaking.
This time last year, we were grieving the loss of our dear professor, Dr. Gary Greene who passed from a heart-attack in his office there at SEBC. I remember like it was yesterday...losing people dear to you, makes you realize who you truly love and what your priorities are.
I love SEBC and it'll always be a very special place to me and to suffer this loss, is very painful. Please pray for SEBC and the Weatherspoon family!
So, back to priorities...what are yours? Is it running around trying to please people or is accomplishing God's Will for you on this earth?!?!? Daq's last statement on his bio on Twitter read - "I just want to be used Lord...Let me be your vessel." How many of us really have that desire? I know one thing, that is my heart...all I want is to be His vessel and do whatever it is He's called me to!
My priority in life right now, is to make sure the people I love - KNOW IT! To graduate - FINALLY! And, to do what God has called me to and, for the time being, I am called to The Well Worship Encounter in Gadsden, Alabama and until He says otherwise (no matter if it's 6 months, 5 years or 20 years), I'll be there! No matter what! And finally, last but not least, I make it priority to serve God with everything within me - to never back down.
What are your priorities? It may be time to get those in check ;)
I found out yesterday that my dear friend Daq from Southeastern Bible College passed away. He was 26-years-old and suffered a heart-attack. I just talked to him on the phone about a photo shoot last week...my heart is still breaking.
This time last year, we were grieving the loss of our dear professor, Dr. Gary Greene who passed from a heart-attack in his office there at SEBC. I remember like it was yesterday...losing people dear to you, makes you realize who you truly love and what your priorities are.
I love SEBC and it'll always be a very special place to me and to suffer this loss, is very painful. Please pray for SEBC and the Weatherspoon family!
So, back to priorities...what are yours? Is it running around trying to please people or is accomplishing God's Will for you on this earth?!?!? Daq's last statement on his bio on Twitter read - "I just want to be used Lord...Let me be your vessel." How many of us really have that desire? I know one thing, that is my heart...all I want is to be His vessel and do whatever it is He's called me to!
My priority in life right now, is to make sure the people I love - KNOW IT! To graduate - FINALLY! And, to do what God has called me to and, for the time being, I am called to The Well Worship Encounter in Gadsden, Alabama and until He says otherwise (no matter if it's 6 months, 5 years or 20 years), I'll be there! No matter what! And finally, last but not least, I make it priority to serve God with everything within me - to never back down.
What are your priorities? It may be time to get those in check ;)
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